I really felt for the users of these chairs. They had back problems and medical issues, trying desperately to find relief. I can only imagine how it must feel to sit in pain all day, every day. And, after seeing so many false claims for other chairs, I could understand how they might be skeptical. So, after reading the new home page copy, I wanted the site visitors to have confidence, to see the difference in the Kneelsit chair and to understand the benefits this chair would offer.
Of course, those in chronic pain were not the only visitors to the Kneelsit site. While they were the primary segment, the audience also consisted of those with mild back pain, those with inconsistent problems or simple fatigue, and those who simply wanted a comfortable chair that wouldn’t contribute to any future back problems. The copy also needed to meet their needs and provide the information they were seeking.
You can see the revised copy here: http://www.copywritingcourse.com/kneelsit-home-new.pdf.
The Headline
The original headline did, in fact, list benefits. It stated:
Superb Comfort, Perfect Posture, Gentle Movement, Natural Balance
However, only one of those benefits spoke to audience members… Superb Comfort. While posture may have been a secondary thought, gentle movement and natural balance didn’t strike a chord simply because of a lack of knowledge. As it happens, these two benefits are important, but the general population doesn’t understand what they mean. It would require educating the site visitors about these two before they would grasp their full meaning. That education couldn’t take place within the headline (not enough room!), so those two benefits needed to be removed.
The headline needed to evoke feelings of trust for the skeptical and a sense of stability for the hesitant. It also needed to provide an obvious benefit – one that would catch the reader’s attention.